Shermy=Share with Me 六寶媽日誌

Dear Alicia & Nicky,

Hello, how are you guys? It’s been a long time not contact with you. I just had a baby two days ago on 2/2 in the afternoon at 1:48 pm. Having a baby is such a horrible and unforgettable experience. Every time I think of the situation at that time, I still feel really amazing and can’t believe I go through the whole thing!

I started feeling hurt at 1am that morning, I felt some liquid running down from my leg when I went to toilet, and I realized it’s time. The contraction made me really hard to sleep, so I just sit in the living room to count how regular it was, and at that time Gaven was still sleeping.

The contraction was about 7 minutes apart at 1am, and after two hours, it dropped to 5 minutes apart. Gaven woke up and asked me what’s wrong, because he can’t find me near bed and was worried. I told him I started contraction now, later will need to go to hospital. He’s bit surprise, and after he made himself a cup of coffee, we went to hospital at 4am in the morning.

The midwife checked for me, and told me inside its already open up to 6cm. And at 8:30am, it’s already 8cm opened, midwife suggested breaking my water to shorten the time, but I’m so afraid and asked for couple hours. Then at 10am, the midwife broke the water, lots of fluid coming out from my body, the gush of the water made such a mess! It flew all over the floor and even wets the whole pant of the midwife!

The contraction now getting closer and closer, and the midwife wanted me to find out the feeling of pushing. But it’s really hard for me to understand, cause my contraction was not that strong, I didn’t feel too painful. However, I followed midwife’s instruction to start pushing at 11:30am, but at that time I was so sleepy. Between the contractions I did felt asleep, and Gaven had to wake me up to ask me to concentrate on pushing.

2 hours passed, my pushing didn’t make any effort to make the baby come out, even the midwife and Gaven can see the baby’s head was just there. I tried lots of different position, but just can’t get the baby out. The midwife called my doctor, and doctor came in later, she suggested using the vacuum to suck the baby’s head out. Once the doctor put the vacuum inside my virgina, I felt really really burn! Within my pushing and the sucking power of vacuum, finally, baby born!

The doctor and midwife put the baby on my chest, I felt so touch at that moment! Can’t believe that, it’s my baby! He looked like a little stranger to me, cause I can’t really tell whether he looks more like me or Gaven. Baby’s so warm, I hold him and looked at him, and listen to the small crying he made. My little Garrett, you finally came out, and it’s such a strange feeling at that moment to realize I’m a mom now!

After baby born, I had a 2 hours surgery on my virgina. I got really deep tear scars inside, and the doctor helped me to sew them up. I didn’t use any gas when I giving birth, but I did when the doctor fixed up the scars. It’s the softest spot on your body. I listen to the doctor to suck in the gas.

It was the first time I tried the gas, and I felt so dizzy. My conscious was very very clear, I can hear properly what’s going on around me, I can feel my baby sucking my nipple and Gaven holding my hand. 

I felt myself drifting in the sky. My body’s there, but I feel nothing. Or I should say, I choose to feel nothing. When the doctor fixed the softest spot, I’ve been asking to suck in more and more gas. Suddenly, just like a broken record, the sound around me kept repeating again and again and again, there’s a sound frequency swinging there, going higher and higher. When I’ve been asking to suck in more gas again, the frequency of the sound stop there, and vibrate very quick, and I knew it’s the feeling of comma.

I’ve been sucking the gas for about an hour; I was bit worry, because I was feeding my baby at the same time. I don’t know whether the gas will affect the baby or not. Finally the surgery came to the end. And the midwife asked me to go for a shower. I felt so dizzy. When I had shower, my conscious flew out a little bit, I saw true white light, I felt myself in heaven. But if I kept myself staying in that situation, my body in the bathroom might be dangerous because I will fall down on the floor at anytime. I drove my conscious back, and finished shower, I felt so pain on my body especially I can’t breathe properly. The midwife told me that pain come from the suffocate on the chest when I did the pushing.

Cause I had such a serious surgery on my virgina, I had to stay in hospital bit longer. Both doctor and midwives said that I’m pretty tough to only use the gas to have that surgery, and didn’t take any pain killer so far. But tell the true, I only feel swollen, not pain at all! Maybe I’m that kind of person who don’t feel pain too much, so that’s why I can cope with my contraction very well as well.

The baby weight 7.6 pounds, 3355g. Not a big baby. I still can’t understand why I can’t push him out. I do feel frustrated! Is that because I got no good energy and strength? Or is it because I didn’t use the position right to do the pushing? I don’t really know, what I know is that, next time I wish when I have another baby, I can use my own strength to push the baby out without any help.

Giving birth is such a painful experience, but it worth! Every time I look at my little man, I feel so proud and happy. Attached are videos and photos, you can have a look at it. The video is Gaven cutting the core. You can see how many people are there when I giving birth (and how many of them all look over my virgina and my bum! Gosh!)

Thanks to my little baby, now my boobies are really swollen with milk (and so big now!!!WOW!!!). Keep in touch and chat later on with you guys in my next mail~

Best Regards,
Shermy